The days have been flying by so quickly, especially now that Elisabeth is a toddler. Every morning sees us in a rush as we get ready to walk with my husband to the train station. Elisabeth is not fond of breakfast at all so it is quite a struggle to find her something she enjoys eating, which makes mornings even harder than they already are.
It makes me think back to the days of catching a 378 to Paddington to watch a French film on a weekday afternoon, followed by a pot of chai in the cafe across the road- those halcyon days, they make me a bit nostalgic. My life now is marked by routines that revolve around my child’s sleep and eating times. I worry about how much she eats and her seeming inability to sleep through the night without some form of comfort.
There are some days where dissatisfaction weighs upon my shoulders so heavily that i start to become angry with the way things are now. It’s not the good kind of angry but the kind of anger that makes me grumpy, depressed and bad company. I am a big proponent of savouring the beauty in our ordinary, everyday lives but some days, i struggle to do this. Here, a beautiful flower; there, the smell of the salty ocean breeze; and again here, the lower and gentler autumn sunlight streaming through the French doors in our study. Some days, these mean very little to me.
But today, there are fresh flowers in the house; the sheets are drying in the sun; my hair is freshly washed. And it’s all good. I may not be able to watch a movie when i feel like it or have long, leisurely breakfasts (my favourite), but for today, i have flowers, clean sheets and clean hair.